Corissa Rieschieck

“Creativity is letting your mind roam where it will and producing something to showcase the journey.”


The In-Between: Dawning Realisations

I don't appreciate being told I can't do things. I am stubborn, and the implication that I don’t have permission to make my own choices is a sure way to push my buttons. It’s no surprise to me that I like to be in control of what is happening around me - I am a teacher after all. Which is what makes it that much harder to accept the realisation that I can't do everything I want to do in the exact moment that I want to do it. I’m no stranger to delayed gratification and the idea that when you work hard to reach a goal or achieve something, the reward is infinitely sweeter. I simply don’t like having to wait. It makes me painfully aware that I grew up on the cusp of two generations and that often the desire for instant gratification takes control. That being said, I also don't like it when I can't do things well, and recent events have made it very clear that when I try to do everything at once, I don't do any of those things as well as I’d like to them.

I’m not good at being still. I realise this is a fact that is painfully obvious to anyone who knows me,  yet it’s one I’m still coming to terms with. I know that I make my own life harder by wanting to do everything at once, by wanting to achieve all the goals that I have for myself immediately. I know that I make my own life more complicated by tackling new challenges at work and at home (at the same time), piling things up as I take them on and carving out the time for each of them. The reality is that I do these things well. Until I don’t. Inevitably, something unexpected crops up to take the wind out of my sails — be it illness, a family emergency, an unexpected circumstance beyond my control — and my carefully planned schedule blows out, I’m left playing catch up, and none of the things I’ve taken on are getting done as well as I want to be doing them.

As a friend recently mentioned during a conversation about how we were both coping at work, I set such high standards for myself that I’m often disappointed when I don’t reach them. Her comment left me reeling; it was something that I’d heard many times in my life, but I don’t think I’d ever been in a place to hear it. This time, it’s been sinking in. I’ve spent a few weeks ruminating on what that statement means to me, and reflecting on how that very fact impacts me day-to-day. I have no intention of lowering my standards, because I wholeheartedly believe that we should be giving our all to everything that we do. I am trying, hard, to remind myself daily that life is not a race and I don’t need to do everything right now. 

After all, we need to take that time to enjoy the moments that lead to the goals too, right? 


Background image by Corissa Rieschieck. Tagline quote by Corissa Rieschieck.